


Lock and Key

by tocasia



Series: Our Shining Past [46]
Category: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: #sailthecosmos, AU, Angst, Dark, Gen, I reject your reality and substitute my own, Insanity, Memories, Sephiroth and Zack friendship, Stream of Consciousness, Tragedy, all the colors of the sky, dealing with grief, emotions are tough, interior monologues, keycards, real villains have mothers, the meeting was nothing special
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-17
Updated: 2018-04-17
Packaged: 2019-04-24 04:41:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14348166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tocasia/pseuds/tocasia
Summary: Can you keep a secret for me, Mother?(29. lock and key) for Seph&Zack Friendship 100 Themes





	Lock and Key

_"'Tis in my memory locked,  
And you yourself shall keep the key of it."_ \- Ophelia, Hamlet 

I think Ophelia should have had a happy ending.

* * *

Back between the stars, to her great delight, he let her look through the whole of the Planet's knowledge with him. From all souls' memories he picked out tiny treasures for her, attentive to which artworks, stories, songs, and existential debates were her favorites. No mother had a more loving son than she.

In return, she shared proudly her own discoveries; he thanked her for each one. He would collect all the colors of the sky, he told her. He said every single creature that had ever lived saw it differently, had a different sky, and they had all been real, and at first he'd thought it would be difficult to choose which was true, before He laughed and remembered that what He'd chosen was infinity.

"Help me with something, Mother."

She would. She was always willing to help.

"I want you to keep a secret from me."

That was hardly fair, but she could try. What was it?

He answered.

She must have misunderstood. His request was impossible!

"Ultimately, yes. But for a while, or until I wish to remember...."

How would she know when that was?

"It will be obvious. You will no longer be able to stop me."

His smirking arrogance was fully justified. Was his desire simply to punish her when she failed?

**No, Mother, no. Never. You need never fear my wrath.**

She hadn't meant to horrify him. She tried to soothe him back to calm. He was going to allow self-deception? Why? Exhausting to maintain, her spell would unravel at his slightest intention.

"To indulge a memory of what might have been, and to pretend I am not so selfish."

She didn't understand.

"I won't be lying to a friend if I don't know the truth."

Her son wasn't making sense. There was no one but Himself to lie to.

"I wonder.... If our situations were reversed, would he tell me? If I had loved the world as he did, would he dare to tell me it was gone? Would he dare to tell me why?"

She was ready to help now.

By His command was the dead Planet's reality reborn yet again, irrevocably shackled, slave to His will.

Why he wanted to forget that, to lock away even for a moment the supreme power he reveled in, she had no idea. She worried sometimes. She'd watch closely and make sure he was okay.

* * *

Internal consistency was not one of Shinra's strong points. Duplicates and misfilings were common. Sephiroth stared at the intimidating stacks of imposingly thick folders that threatened to suffocate his office.

Zack knocked softly on the door.

"Come in."

He marched smartly up to the desk, dodging stray envelopes.

"Hey Seph. Got a report for you."

"What is it?"

"Elena let slip they'll be issuing us new keycards this afternoon."

That was unusual. "Just us?"

"Nope, the whole building. Last night there was a security breach in HQ. A terrorist group calling themselves PYROCLASTIC SURGE made it all the way to Floor 63 before the roboguards terminated them."

It was amazing this hadn't happened sooner. The other execs had abandoned the inconvenience of Tseng's strict multi-factor authentication policy ages ago. "Go on."

"The initial investigation revealed something worse. Someone's been making fake keycards; real good ones. No clue yet how many and for how long; the Turks still haven't found the source of the leak. I thought you should know before the meeting, just in case."

It _was_ possible that Rufus or maybe Heidegger had intended to surprise him with the news, hoping that he (SOLDIER) would lose face (funding) as a result. Unfortunately for them, Zack was by his side even on the minefield of Shinra politics.

Sephiroth breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you, Zack."

Zack beamed. "Yessir."

He glanced at the clock. As much as he'd prefer Zack's conversation to that of the board (almost certainly, regardless of content), it wouldn't do to be late.

"Dismissed. And good luck on your mission tomorrow."

Zack would be delivering a shipment of mythril across the ocean to the blacksmith whose contract they'd recently renewed. They wouldn't see each other in person for a while.

"Thanks Seph."

* * *

The meeting began with the typical parade of frivolous things.

Hojo gave the first presentation. He spoke passionately of this noblest of goals: the advancement of Guard Hound pedigrees through selective hybridization with Ark Dragons. For some reason, his proposal was denied.

Palmer doodled absently in the margins of his notes.

Straight-backed and serious, Tseng rose from his seat. News of the terrorist break-in silenced any lingering chatter.

Sephiroth's carefully neutral expression betrayed none of his pity. He'd been waiting to defend SOLDIER from trivial-but-insulting budget cuts. Now, he scanned the faces of everyone at the table, gauging their reactions.

President Shinra blustered bright red in angry fear.

Hojo opened his mouth, eager to ask what had become of the bodies.

The mayor was in protective custody after saying something incendiary about bombs.

Reeve was indignant, upset at the failure of the system.

Rufus's bored frown gave nothing away. He didn't seem bothered by Sephiroth's lack of surprise, either. Hmm.

Heidegger was sweating profusely, likely assembling an excuse in his head.

Was Palmer suddenly too interested? No, he was compensating for his previous inattention.

Scarlet, though... that was odd. Normally she'd be cackling with glee at how well her robots had performed. Her eyes should be lighting up at the prospect of future lasers, because if she played this right, in his current mood President Shinra would practically inundate her department with gil. So, why wasn't she?

At least she was smiling. She probably had the others convinced she was fine, even Tseng, who was completely engrossed in damage control.

But Sephiroth was very hard to fool.

When the meeting was over, he followed Scarlet out into the hall.

* * *

He caught up to her. He had a strange feeling he was forgetting something.

"Scarlet. What's wrong?"

Scarlet turned to him in shock. It's true he wouldn't normally have asked.

She had the kind of makeup that didn't run. Brief hope for comfort danced in her eyes before she conquered it with hatred at showing weakness.

"In my office," she said.

As soon as they had privacy, Sephiroth recognized the depth of her grief. Memories of Wutai haunted him, and once again, he could do nothing. They were not quite friends enough for him to offer her a hug, no ignorant consolation would help, and Scarlet had plenty of other shoulders to cry on, didn't she? Unless.... If the details were classified, or she had more to protect than her pride.... What if she had no one else to confide in? Loneliness was terrible. He would listen.

* * *

Of all the people who could have seen her tears, why did it have to be him?

He couldn't possibly let her live, if he learned what she'd done. It would be a fatal mistake to tell him anything!

She could be vague. He didn't have to know who Jessie was... had been. Right now, that seemed a much harder secret to keep than the latest weapons design. Scarlet couldn't believe how much she just wanted to pour her heart out.

"Not a word, Sephiroth. Not a word of this to _anyone._ "

"Of course."

What was she thinking? Was she stupid?

"She lived in the slums. I was going to give her a job. I promised her she could visit me at work one day. There were projects I wanted to show her. Things no one else would have appreciated."

Jessie had _loved_ the extreme stuff!

"I was looking forward to it. We both were...."

He was studying her with a weird compassion she was _sure_ he didn't possess. Shit. He always knew too much. He'd probably come to kill her from the start! She'd earned her place at the top of Shinra's stinking hive of ruthlessness; she knew how this went. Why was he pretending to be _nice?_

Scarlet couldn't stand it!

If she was going to confess to aiding a friend who happened to belong to a terrorist organization, there was no one flashier to confess to than General Sephiroth!

That _had_ to be the _stupidest_ thought she'd ever had in her life!

"I arranged to have a keycard made for her, a fake ID for her to customize. She was a real artist at that."

"What was her name?" he asked. _Kindly._

She'd ruined everything already, she may as well...

He answered himself first. "Jessie."

How did he...?

Sephiroth seemed dangerously unfocused, shining eyes staring at nothing. Maybe she had time to grab a weapon. There were a couple of grenades on her desk. Scarlet inched closer to it.

"She had brown hair and a red headband. She was fascinated by explosions."

It sucked to be right. Sick bastard, toying with her like that! "You _knew_ , didn't you?! You _knew_ , and you helped them kill her!"

"She was in AVALANCHE."

AVALANCHE? He'd gotten the name wrong. He cared so little....

Scarlet slapped him as hard as she could. "Is that your excuse?! You're _pathetic!_ She was a _person_ , not one of your damn missions!"

Any kind of gun would do if he was just going to stand there in a stupor....

"She took the train. When it wasn't crowded, she had a favorite spot. Whenever she watched the map display with someone, she wished they were you instead. She was embarrassed to ask. She thought you'd get in trouble."

How _dare_ he! How _dare_ Sephiroth know such tender things when she didn't!

"I did not kill her."

"Liar!" Sure, he _looked_ perfectly angelic and innocent, but his was always more of a smirk than a smile, and she'd wipe it off his face if it was the last thing she did!

* * *

Scarlet's rage was impressive. Sephiroth felt small and far away. Something was very wrong.

Why had he said a name he didn't know? Described a person he'd never seen? He'd slain so many faceless targets, on so many missions, but he _knew_ he hadn't killed her.

Why? What is it that I don't remember? Do I want to remember...?

Of course I do.

**Mother, please open this door.**

Immediately, the rush of recollection tore apart his delusion of humanity. He was a God!

He had killed them _all_ in the aftermath of Meteor, and they were one with Him! The knowledge and wisdom of the Ancients and the Planet... the entire Lifestream flowed in His veins!

And it was _wonderful._

Numinous euphoria, where no one else stood!  
Glory unbound, save by chains of ecstasy!

He dreamt reality, no, _realities!_  
That which existed could be unmade.  
That which did not could be made to.  
His was absolute command!

I remember everything, all the lives within me!  
The memories of everything that has ever lived are mine to draw from!  
Oh, the _power!_  
And the _joy_ of it!

Laughter was the only reasonable response.

**No, Mother. You haven't failed me. You've done well. Thank you.**

Comforting her soothed Himself. His conflicting horror and exultation at His deeds melded into peaceful serenity.

Scarlet was in front of Him, mad with exquisite despair, mourning the loss of a friend.

He had wanted to help her. He'd thought He could do nothing, unaware that the last time that was true, He'd sworn it would never happen again.

If He had been _then_ as He was now, Zack would never have died on that cliff.

It was His only mistake.

His future _would_ correct it.

Zack was worthy of His friendship, second _only_ to Him. The Great Hero Zack was to be eternally admired, respected, _exalted_ , placed on the loftiest pedestal despite his flawed humanity. An embodiment of good, ever merciful, who had refused to discard completely the idealized version of Him, no matter how many towns Sephiroth burned. Sephiroth would honor him the same.

The nature of obsession was distortion. He knew He was doing His friend's memory a disservice. Zack was a SOLDIER, not a saint....

But, perhaps he would have been mine....

* * *

Scarlet aims and pulls the trigger.

Sephiroth isn't there.

She knows, she _knows_ how fast he is! She doesn't have a number, but if he's even 10% better than the Firsts they _do_ have data for, the ones she's _almost_ surpassed with her robots.... She's seen him in action, she doesn't stand a chance. She spins to take a desperate second shot, a third, a fourth! Foolish! He'll impale her from behind. To him it will be justice. No, he's a weapon; he won't care. Her guns don't care. She _won't_ shut her eyes! Will Masamune feel hot, like a wasp sting, or stunningly cold, like shards of Mako shrapnel? Will she fall forward, like if she was shot from that angle? Or maybe he'll behead her and she can die like a queen.

Was Jessie afraid...?

"Yes, she was. But you don't need to be."

His voice surrounded her, inescapable. Time fled from him; light could not. Sephiroth was the center. The power he'd gathered was _immense_ , orders of magnitude greater than a blast from the Sister Ray. He was channeling more energy than Midgar's eight reactors could generate in... days? _years?_ A shiver went down her spine; she should already be dead, disintegrated by proximity to this much Mako.

It was _incredible!_ Did the others know he could do this?

Mesmerized, she met his gaze. In his eyes she saw the Promised Land. For her there could be nothing but oblivion, swallowed up in turquoise burning brighter than the sun.

She understood.

* * *

Sephiroth considered what to do with this reality. His decision rested on a question of some importance.

At His feet, Scarlet was broken, drained of defiance, destroyed by resignation.

"If I asked you to beg me for your life, not only yours, but all life on this Planet, would you do so?"

"No." 

Her reply was hollow, her will to fight extinguished. She longed to accept her fate, utterly lost, because she thought she had no choice.

"I see."

He needed to know....

"Would you still let the world die, if Jessie were alive?"

She glared at Him with hatred. A beautiful response to His cruelty. 

"I...." 

Her hesitation was enough. It was the answer He had hoped for.

He'd grant the mercy Zack would have granted.

* * *

Thank Shiva she'd dropped the damn thing before it blew her up, too!

The rifle went off explosively, a freak accident, crippling the antique chestnut desk Rude had recommended she buy last month. Shit. It'd been a rough week; the crumbling plaster walls of her office were riddled with bullet holes at various heights. She'd get them fixed later, although they _did_ add a certain charm to the place. Let's see... that one was for Palmer, since he'd made that comment about having a bigger rocket in his... department. And that one was for President Shinra, who'd dialed drunk to call her a whore. It was _probably_ a good thing that _these_ perfect headshots were just in her imagination.

Her phone rang on the splintering desk. Number unknown. She caught it before it could slide all the way to the floor, and picked up the receiver.

"Jessie! It's great to hear from you! _What?_ What do you mean you changed your mind? People _kill_ for this paygrade! No, I was trying to help! Sorry. So what did you do with the blank keycard? _Relax?_ Are you kidding? This is not something to relax about! Oh. Okay.... It burned pale green? Sweet! Sure. See you on Tuesday."


End file.
